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What I Learned From My Dogs Today – Velcro Manufacturing Explained

Momma Mim guest blogging today.

I use to love Mr. Roger’s “how it is made” films. It is how I learned how crayons, fortune cookies, and rubber balls came to be. If I had a magic wand, everything on earth would come with an attached card explaining it’s existence. But some things are self explanitory when it comes to where it is from. Velcro for example.

It is very plain to me that Velcro is produced from shearing poodles. I am not sure where these poodle farms are – New Zealand perhaps? But somewhere there are acres and acres of poodle filled land meeting the demand for Velcro worldwide.

How am I quite sure of this? Let’s look at the evidence.  For starters, poodles are Velcro. Just ask anyone who has had one. They stick to you no matter what you are doing.

Going to the loo…

dogs bathroom

Out on the town….

shasta at bar lapdog

Kicking back on the sofa….

shasta velcro

When attempting to do sit ups….

dogs sit ups

And not only are they attached to you every time you turn around, everything else sticks to them.  Leaves (small and large) …

shasta leafShandy leaf

Small purple flowers…..

sherlock in ear

shasta flower nose arrow

Not to mention all kinds of other oddball items….

shasta marshmallo

They are like dryer sheets. They stick to everything including the clean laundry….

snug bug

They even stick to each other….

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My dream is to one day be able to visit one of the poodle ranches during round-up and shearing and then watch as they make the final product. I also wish Mr. Rodgers was still around to enlighten the masses. As for now, I need to go brush my teeth while attached to my two spoos and hope the toothpaste doesn’t find it’s way to stick on them.

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What I Learned From My Dogs Today – I’m Not Saying Your Child Looks Like a Dog…

Momma Mim being allowed to blog today:

The results are in.  The average dog is as smart as the average two year old human.  So my advice today goes for bare skinned, as well as fur covered, kids. Put this to memory: if you don’t want to do something for the rest of your life, don’t do it even once for your child/dog.

I learned this the hard way with my two footed child. I made the mistake one time of cutting his sandwich in triangles instead of rectangles. Now, I am destined to stress over geometry every time I make one. When I am in an assisted living retirement home and my 65 year old son comes to visit, I will still have to make sure he is not served anything with four sides – three it is for eternity. If you do it and they like it: game over.

No squares

It hit me this applied to dogs as well when I had my dearly departed Shandy.  Shandy would sit at my feet every day while I put on my make up.  One day I decided to let her smell my blush. It was so cute how her little nose went into action. The next day I let her smell my lipstick before I put it on.  Then I got a new makeup brush and, without thinking it through, used the old one and tickled her nose with it.  The monster was born. From then on out, even if I didn’t have time to put my own makeup, hers had to be done. She wouldn’t go pee until she had her NARS bronzer on.  And if she didn’t get to smell check my lipstick for the day she would pitch a fit.  I will admit I would give anything to put a dot of foundation on her nose just once more, but at the time it was heck.

shandy nose

She was such a diva.

bad hair

My current problem I created by not following my own advice involves coconut oil.  I have used this on my face as a moisturizer for decades.  Lately, a blog made it’s way around touting all the great uses for it. The one that caught my eye was that it was good for dogs. So, one night after rubbing some into my cheeks, I called the dogs over to see if they would like the taste. Uggggg. My nightly routine for the last few months is now this: brush my teeth, wash my face, and put coconut oil on my face while being stared at, give Sherlock the opportunity to lick any remaining oil off my fingers, feel sorry for Shasta not getting any and scooping her out some, give into Sherlock’s whining because Shasta got a scoop and he only got a lick and get more for him, give into Shasta’s whining because Sherlock got to lick my finger’s twice and she only got to lick it once and get more out for her, cave to Sherlock’s pestering because Shasta….. you get the drift.

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And it has to be off my fingers. I got a spoon but did not want to put the spoon back in the jar after the dogs licked it and they had no patience waiting for me to wash it. I then put it on little plates, but the idea of me still having a remaining molecule left on my fingers made the plates mute. Now I scoop some with a spoon and let them lick it off my digits. Everyone is happy. Well, except me. I resent the fact every night I am required to become a coconut flavored lollipop.

So the moral of the story is: think about your every action when it comes to your pups/offspring! It may only take a second and not seem like a big deal at the time, but if you do something for your babies once, the 7,529,462 times you will have to repeat it will wear you down.

And for the record – child approved….

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Poodle approved….

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